In and Around the Mulberry Bush

Why is it that we spend so much of our life thinking we understand happiness,
only to find out that happiness can be shattered during impulsive and rash moments?
Why is it that a sharp tongue and repressed feelings can weave a pattern of torn hearts and seething hatred?
Why is it that most of the time, we can't see the misshapen clock of misfortune,
for the wheels seem perfectly round and no matter what,
they keep spinning in pretty colors,
distractng us from the time wasted and lost on a life that we can't undo?
Why does the second hand keep the time moving foward
when sometimes we wish all would stop?
Why can't things work out in perfect synchronicity?
I am the eternal optimist, living in a pessimist's world,
and I feel my colors fading into the darkness that shrouds life's existence.
Paint my canvas with new colors
and show me a green sunrise and a sea of red and orange;
take me to a world of flying zebras and talking animals;
blindfold me and pull me into a world of dancing statues and still life.
Spin me around and let me go.
I want to wander aimlessly until I can dance no more.
I want to fall into the rabbit hole and come out the other side --
into a life undiscovered.

Within My Labyrinth Walls

when I am alone, I know you are here.
you make everything alright without a word, and with many words.
even when you haven't spoken, your breath still softens my fall.
the days are so long, and the nights even longer, and all of them I endure amidst a sea of open arms, people holding me tightly, yet feeling so alone in my quiet desolation.
life continues, my dreams prevail, yet I tiptoe through life avoiding the cracks and mud puddles.
why is it that I am filled with such rejuvenation on a day of grey clouds and sleeping sunshine?
why is it that I am told that I erase the clouds and fill the room with sunshine?
why do I want to cry when all I can do is smile?
why is life so cruel to play my heart against my mind and bring tucked away tears into cheeks filled with roses?
I want to curl up in a basket of flowers and float into the ocean of forgiveness and undeniable questions, laughing at the seals who tickle my toes.
calm the waves and let me ride them out and wait for me on the other side.
if you look across the horizon, you'll see me laughing with the stars and singing with the fish.
how happy I can be when life's treasures surround me.
I'm coming home.
promise me you'll always wait for me.

Promenade.

Shall I map out the way I once ventured?
Or shall I take in stride the company of my dwellings?
In this course my steps shall find the road
and wander through the brambles,
taking care to miss the thorns
and dawdle about the daffodils.

A sweet fragrance of afternoon bliss,
a warm caress of the afternoon breezes-
and yet my heart knows not the scent of that which it can not taste.
I need all my senses to create true existence in this mindless adventure.

Tender child,
Look not upon the weeds-
But look between them;
there you shall find your treasures.

The enchanted laughter awakens me.
Take my hand I want to know this place
which is so far beyond my earthly comprehension.
Can I dance? Can I sing? Can I stay?
This place, so rich with color and bejeweled with the dew of the morn,
has captured my soul.

Here my heart finds soothing solicitude,
seemingly perfect and enlivening.
A place closing off the world
which so many times rejects the beauty that lies within.
Here, beauty emerges from even the most somber of shadows.
I no longer fear the darkness.

The brilliance of tiny burning lights
brighten up it's every corner with the music of joy,
the harmony of this magic from within.
My home.
My sanity.
My journey.
My heart.
I am finally here.

This moment,
this life,
this bit of memory is forever lasting.
Bathing in the drops of starshine, I feel renewed.
A vivification of my soul emerges from within this tired soul.
It is here that I will remain young and learn to live anew.

From Within

Laughing with the morning, her melodies ring out,
each song moving on the breath of another.
Sunshine and frost mold armor around her,
guarding her soul within it's hardened mask.
Blue eyes become glass;
she disappears.

Crying in the night her soliliquy patterns on-
each verse tapering off with the stillness of her muffled sobs.
Shadows and light form a brightened darkness around her,
caressing her soul within its tightened grasp.
Blue eyes fade to black;
she disappears.